Tagged with humor

People For Whom I Would Rather Vote For President

On our drive up the coast from Disneyland, Max and I made a list of people – real and fictional – for whom we would rather vote for President. I’m not sure if that sentence makes grammatical sense. It’s very late/early. Without further ado… Jed Bartlet Matthew Santos Martin Sheen Bill Pullman’s character from Independence … Continue reading

Cute Jack Stories

(originally posted on LiveJournal) I’m not sure where it came from, but Max and I decided that Simba (from The Lion King) goes “wiggle wiggle pounce!”. We have taught Jack that, starting when he was just a wee small baby. We extended that to all cats, ferrets, and occasionally other animals as well. Last night, Dino … Continue reading

My Job and Another Jack Funny

(originally posted on LiveJournal) Jack funny first. Jack was in his car, driving to work. He said, “I’m the Mommy, so I’m going to work… My manager is selfish and mean.” I love my son. I hate my job. I’ve been up til about 2 am most nights working. All of our products are released … Continue reading

Jack’s First Pun

(originally published on LiveJournal) We’re playing Incredibles (with Jack dressed in his Incredibles pjs) and Max is Mr. Incredible. We went to my office to fight the Omni Droid. Mr. Incredible says, “Where is something I can punch?” Without missing a beat, Jack goes to the craft table, picks up my dragonfly shape maker and … Continue reading

Nana’s In Heaven

Jack saw my mom’s jewelry box and wanted to know what was in it. I told him that it was some of Nana’s jewelry. He said, “Nana went to heaven.” I said, “Yes.” He said, like a jaded teenager, “So you took her stuff?” I love my kid. Even if he hasn’t been using his listening … Continue reading

Temperature in Hell: 0 Degrees Celsius

(originally published on LiveJournal) If you know me in real life, then you know I say “I’m sorry” a lot. Not as much as jayspec, but certainly on the top ten “I’m sorry” sayers list.My father, on the other hand, never apologizes. For anything. He sent me a box of books without asking. The box … Continue reading

I Forgot I Wrote This

(Originally published on LiveJournal) I’m going through one of the docs I wrote at Oracle because Contract Writer isn’t familiar with FrameMaker. All of my Oracle doc was written for writers. I was looking at this topic, about filing bugs against our group: To log a bug or enhancement request, you must obtain an account for … Continue reading

Umm… Did they think this through?

(originally published on LiveJournal) Isn’t the “Next Generation” what we’re trying to prevent by buying (and presumably using) condoms? Current Location:home, Antioch, CA Current Mood: busy Current Music:Olympics

Overheard from the Kitchen

My MIL is about to feed Jack dinner. Max is helping her decide what to feed him, and starts microwaving something. MIL: What’s that we have there? Max: (in bright tone) It’s Winter Squash! MIL: (excited) Winter Squash?!? That sounds ducky! Max: (in parent voice) No, organic winter squash and water. Well, I thought it … Continue reading