My Favorite Adoption-Related Posts of 2012

The Open Adoption Bloggers created a list of the Best Adoption-Related Posts of 2012. So, yesterday and today, I’m posting my favorite adoption-related blog posts of 2012. These are my favorite posts from other bloggers.

Items marked with an asterisk (*) are my most favorite posts.

  • You’re So Normal! ~ They’re All My Own *
    I chose this as my favorite post to submit to the Open Adoption Bloggers.
    “I have read The Primal Wound, with an open mind. I do not suffer from a primal wound and I resent anyone telling me that because I was adopted, I am wounded. I resent any book that attempts to explain all adoptees.  I resent reading that if I feel I don’t have a primal wound, that I am in denial.”
  • Adoption is Kind of Like an Izusu Pickup ~ The Happiest Sad
    “This is the benefit of openness. Roo will never have to be vigilant, on the lookout. She knows what I look like and who I am.”
  • I’m Curious: Was Your Relinquishment Day Happy? ~ The Chronicles of Munchkinland
    “I don’t deny that in certain cases, a mother relinquishing her child might be able to feel happy. I know others who spoke of not quite happiness but instead a peace; they were at peace with their decision but they still felt a sadness. I know many others who felt an incredible, deafening, eye-blurring sadness — like me.”
  • The Disappearing Birthfather: Reality and Myth ~ Statistically Impossible
    “The assumptions made about birthfathers highlight some problematic hypocrisy.”
  • On Adopting From Utah and Other “Adoption Friendly” States ~ Ethica
    “Utah laws are often referred to as “adoption friendly.” This means that they are “friendly” to adoptive parents and agencies. They are not in the best interests of expectant parents.”
  • Adopted or Abducted? Things to Keep in Mind Before Getting Upset at Dan Rather’s Report ~ The Declassified Adoptee
    “This report is about a point in time where, whether by adoption practices, a sexist political system, a stigmatizing society, or a combination and intersection of many or all the above, a significant population of women were denied the chance to parent their newborn babies when they would have very much chosen to parent had they felt they had other options or were even given the chance to do so.”
  • A Word About My Peace ~ The Chronicles of Munchkinland
    “So, no, my peace doesn’t mean that I’m always happy. … It means that, at my core, I’m okay with the mixed bag of emotions that come with adoption relinquishment.”
  • Nature vs. Nurture & What my Connection to my Mothers Looks Like ~ The Declassified Adoptee
    “‘[R]eally, it’s about expanding my connections–not limiting them.'”
  • Living with it ~ Statistically Impossible
    “As a society we deplore poverty. In adoption we recognize its powerful impact. Yet we aren’t being honest about it, or our attitudes toward it.”
  • NCFA is not the “Expert” on Adoption Issues ~ Family Ties
    “NCFA’s opposition to adoptee rights has never wavered, even as more and more statistics have been compiled to refute its claims.”
  • The Art of “Shut Up and Listen” ~ Another Version of Mother *
    “You don’t have to negate your own feelings and opinions in order to be respectful to another person. You CAN articulate your thoughts in away that allows the other person to see your point of view, and you can still LISTEN to that point of view without it destroying your ethics, morals or personal views.”
  • Be Grateful! Yeah Right… ~ Insert Bad Movie Title Here
    “Regardless of adoption, I don’t think that children should have to be grateful to their parents for bringing them into this world.”
  • When was the last time you were around a day old baby? ~ And other ideas and thoughts
    “Love and healthy attachment aren’t just a given. Good parent/child relationships take time and energy to develop, it’s not something that’s just handed to you along with your baby upon giving birth.”
  • Yay or Nay ~ Statistically Impossible
    “The question stands; am I pro or anti adoption? … I’m neither. I’m pro-child.”
  • Things I Wish All Adoptive Parents Knew (from a Birthmother’s Point of View) ~ Blessings in Disguise *
    “Always keep your promises. This goes for birth parents and adoptive parents alike. Promises in open adoption are worth gold…there is no relationship more delicate or fragile on earth, so promises are sacred.”
  • Dear Abby: Adoption Right Thing to Do ~ Earth Stains
    “What can we learn from these mothers about Adoption Healing? What constructive message can be gleaned?”
  • Option Counseling ~ Parents of Color Seek Newborn to Adopt
    “I’m not an abortion counsellor — I’m an options counsellor.”
  • parents, please educate your kids about adoption so mine don’t have to ~ Rage Against the Minivan *
    “But is it too much to ask that other parents, whose families don’t have exposure to transracial families, take a couple minutes and explain it to them so that my kids aren’t always the center of the After-School Special on Adoption in the school playyard?”
  • Pro Child ~ Living the Bittersweet Life
    “To me, pro-child means that the child comes first and isn’t that what we did as birthmothers? Since pro-child means doing what is best for the child that could mean parenting and other times that can mean adoption.”
  • Adult Adoptees go to Congress: the Recap You’ve Been Waiting for ~ The Declassified Adoptee
    “Every once and a while, things happen that let you know its all worth it.”
  • Shading the Truth to Ease the Fears of Adoptive Parents ~ Family Ties
    “Research about adoption shows clearly that secrets never serve the best interest of an adopted child.”
  • Distance ~ Adoption: Share the Love
    “I see adoptive parents quite often who are asking for advice and are very upset that their child’s birth parent has been pulling away from the openness.”
  • Transracial Adoption: The Importance of Honoring Your Child’s Racial and Cultural Identity ~ The Diary of a Not-So-Angry Asian Adoptee
    “Even though it’s the PC thing to say, we don’t live in a color blind world. We live in a color aware world. While most people are accepting of different races, there are people who view the world differently and have very ignorant and close-minded beliefs when it comes to race.”
  • Adoptive Parents and Pro-lifers who Cannot or Will Not See the Realities of Adoption ~ Family Ties
    “Today, during these times, I’m no longer distributing free passes when it comes to ignorance about adoption.  We have the data and research to support the fact that secrecy does not serve the best interest of the child.”
  • Rocking the Boat ~ Foster Parenting Adventures *
    “As I mentioned in a previous post, there is Affirmative Action in foster-adoption.  Children with “special needs” continue to receive adoption subsidies, medical coverage and lawyer fee coverage after they are adopted.”
  • Raw ~ God Will Fill This Nest
    “What amazed me though as myself and the other adoptive families started sharing about our placements– our children’s birth families, and the bumps in our journeys–is how RAW those emotions still are for me.”
  • Exploring the Great Divide in Adoption: Why You’re Not That Different ~ Diary of a Not-So-Angry Asian Adoptee *
    “Rather than focusing only on the things that set you apart from other adoptive parents, focus on the similarities that can be used in supporting each other.”
  • Interview Project 2012 ~ Insert Bad Movie Title Here
    “The only way to raise a child yourself or place a child with others, is to do it with integrity and honesty.”
  • Guest Post: Have You Ever Wondered About Birthmoms? ~ Chocolate Hair, Vanilla Care
    “In the hopes to dispel some common misconceptions and notions about the other side of adoption. I would like for you to join me, briefly, to look through my eyes, the mother who said one last goodbye to the child whom someone else now has opportunity to hug every morning.”
  • NSW Proposed shift towards adoption ~ Growing Family
    “Contrasting those 65 [adopted] children with the 18,000 children in out-of-home-care in NSW, it seems clear to me that a long term loving family for these children, most of whom will not be restored to family, is just good sense.”
  • Adoptee Interview with Priscilla ~ Adoption: Share the Love
    “Although the court needed to finalize my adoption, I never needed a paper to tell me who my parents were.”
  • Unmarried Fathers v. Married Fathers ~ AdoptionTalk
    “[C]ases that ignore unmarried fathers who desire to parent are morally outrageous, but they’re legally ambigous.  But a case that ignores a MARRIED father?  That is a new low in adoption placement.”
  • International Adoptions Back In The News ~ Creating a Family
    “As with any article about international adoption, the comments are full of admonishments that the Carrs should have adopted one of the thousands of waiting kids in the US. Even though these comments are infuriatingly predictable, they always make me want to scream because of their ignorance about US foster care adoptions.”
  • Shaped By Love ~ They’re All My Own
    “One granddaughter related by biology, one related by adoption. Both equally loved, both equally their grandmother’s grandchildren.”
  • The Wrong Question ~ The Happiest Sad
    “The right question is, “What would my son’s life be like if I had placed him?” And the answer consists of every reason I placed Roo for adoption.”


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